And how was Panama?

Panama was wonderful until it wasn’t. The course went well. The facilities were great. The diving was fine. The students mostly did okay. We laughed. He flirted. He grabbed my fins. We joked. Etc…  

The last night we were there we were back in the city and it was just the two of us. I was feeling great. We were done and everything went well. It was the first time we had held the course there so a lot could have gone wrong, but it didn’t. I felt like celebrating.  I texted him about dinner he said yes and now. I met him in the lobby and he wanted to just eat in the lobby restaurant. It’s a TGIFridays. We are in panama. We are at our old haunts where we first got to know each other and went out to dinner every night and shared desserts and he wants to eat at TGIFridays? I suggest we go to an area and find dinner instead and he agrees. We find a place he remembers and sit down. I’m in a black sundress and he’s an ice cube. I try  to get the conversation going and he lightens up only to shut down again. We toast to our success. We walk around a bit. I ask if everything is okay. He says he supposes so. My response sucks. We catch a cab and go back to the hotel. I walk to his room to pick up some fins and am in his doorway. He hands me the fins and says thanks for your help. Good job. I say good night. Ice cube. Popsicle. Idiot. 

I had the entire next day to myself. I went on a few runs, walked around alone, and cried a lot. 

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